大耳朵每日學英語20150920


8 Mindsets Which Prevent Success And Happiness

8種心態阻止了成功和幸福

1.Superhero Syndrome

超級英雄綜合症

In short, you are all about saving, fixing, renovating and achieving the ideal in everyone- including yourself. A large part of this is about trying to find meaning and satisfaction by creating and fixing problems that are within your control- or, at least, ones you have convinced yourself are within your control. What you are actually doing is avoiding real problems and real progress.

簡而言之,你都是在幫助每個人拯救、修複、翻新和實現理想——包括你自己。很大一部分是試圖通過創建和修複在你的控製內的問題找到價值感和滿足感——或者,至少你相信自己是在你的控製之內。你做的是避免真正的問題和真正的進步。

2.Scrap-booking happiness

2、幸福剪貼薄

When you scrap-book, you take snippets and photos of your life and stick them in a big, empty book so you can look back on them and see what you’ve accomplished. You also tend to do that with your everyday life, as though you’re keeping score of successes. Continuously checking in with yourself to see if you are allowed to be happy is a sure way of convincing yourself that you’re not.

當你在製作剪貼薄的時候,把你生活的照片和一些片段貼在一個大的、空的書裏,這樣你可以回顧,看看你所取得的成就。你也可以為你的日常生活這樣做,就像你是在為你的成功記分。不斷檢查自己是否快樂是一種相信自己不是的確定的方式。

3.You convince yourself that anything to do with pain is a roadblock

你要相信做起來很痛苦的事情都是障礙

Your gut is not exactly a psychic hotline, but it is the proverbial magic eight-ball built inside us all; unlike the eight-ball, however, a lot of us tend to ignore what it is telling us. A big issue comes from avoiding anything we associate with being ‘painful’ or ‘difficult’. Pain is not a pleasant thing, certainly, but that does not mean that it is always a roadblock to be avoided. Always going with what you think will make you happy is a good way to miss out on experiences that can lead you to success.

你的直覺不是一個心理熱線,但它是眾所周知的建在我們所有人旁邊的神奇八號球;然而,不同於八號球,很多人傾向於忽視它告訴我們什麼。一個大問題是避免任何與我們相關的“痛苦”或“困難”。當然,痛苦並不是一個令人愉快的事情,但這並不意味著它總是要避免的一個路障。總是用你認為會讓你快樂的方式會讓你錯過可以帶領你成功的經曆。

4.The reductionist approach to life

簡化生活方式

This is a mindset that many live with: “live small, stay in control”. Another way of thinking of this mindset is viewing it as the “settler” method: settling for a relationship where you are under-valued, settling for a job where you are treated poorly, and never taking a chance on your life or on new experiences. This mindset comes from self-esteem issues, typically, but it is also a way in which people stay in control of their lives. Sometimes, it is good thing to not be fully in control.

這是一種生活的態度:“生活很小,在控製之內”。思考這種心態的另一個思路是把它視為“定居者”的方法:解決你在哪裏被低估的關係,解決你在哪裏找工作被輕視,而且從不給你的生活或新體驗一個機會。典型地,這種心態來源於自尊問題,但是也是一種人們控製自己的生活的方式。有時候不完全被控製也是一件好事。


5. Checking boxes

檢查箱子


A lot of us know this one, and, unfortunately, succumb to it. This is the checklist that society often hands us with a footnote that reads “you will be happy when all these boxes are checked”. A home with a mortgage, two cars, a marriage, a family, and a career. Living a life that makes you happy outside of that checklist seems bizarre, even sinful to some – but it is your life. You’re the one who ultimately decides how your story is told.

很多人知道這個,不幸的是都屈服於它。這是社會經常用注腳來影響我們的清單,上麵寫著“當所有這些箱子被檢查你會很高興”。貸款的房屋, 兩輛車,婚姻,家庭,和職業。生活讓你擁有奇異的甚至罪惡的清單以外的快樂,——但這是你的生活。你是最終決定你的故事講的是什麼的人。


6. Never examining your opinions or beliefs again

不會再檢查你的意見或信念

You’ve found a mindset and it’s going to stick for life, right? “This group is wrong”, “this political party is full of idiots”, “this is how I feel about: [insert everything that makes you angry]”. Alright, fair enough, but what happens when you won’t allow yourself to try out different perspectives? Your opinions and views stagnate, there is no growth and then every event that ever happens is viewed in terms of who is to blame- rather than as an opportunity to gain perspective and learn.

你發現了一種心態,它是需要堅持的,對吧?“這組是錯的”,“這政黨都是白癡”,“這就是我如何感受的:插入所有令你生氣的東西”。好了,說得對,但當你不允許自己嚐試不同的觀點時會發生什麼?你的意見和觀點停滯不前,沒有增長,那麼發生的每一個事件都會變成是責怪誰是罪魁禍首,而不是作為一個機會來獲得觀點和學習。

7. Getting angry at qualities you see in others (that reflect your own)

看見別人的品質而生氣(反映出你自己的品質)

Ever get really angry at a person for being a downer? Or a gossip? A mindset like this stops us from evaluating “Why am I so angry and hateful toward this person/this quality?” Self-examination can be a difficult and agonizing process, but it allows for growth and insight. This process allows us to work on that issue, instead of ignoring it.

會因為一個人變成令人沮喪的人還是愛說長道短的人而真正的生氣?這樣的心態阻止我們評估“為什麼我如此憤怒和恨這個人/這個品質呢?“自我檢查是一個困難和痛苦的過程,但它讓我們成長和增長我們的洞察力。這個過程可以讓我們解決問題,而不是忽視它。

8. Denying reality

8、否認現實

This one is one a lot of people are guilty of: ‘I can handle this by myself’, ‘I’m happy with things as they are’, ‘I’ve got to achieve more to be happy’, etc. This ties in with the reductionist approach and it is also counter-intuitive. What if you do handle everything yourself? You might feel proud but you might also experience being burnt out. If you achieve more, what happens when you find you aren’t really happy? Our search for happiness is often hindered by our inability to realize the truth. Being honest with yourself is another frightening prospect, but one that opens you up to happiness and success.

這是一個很多人都犯的錯誤:我可以自己處理這個問題,事實上我現在很開心”,“我要得到更多的快樂”,等等。這個與歸結主義是一致的,它也是反直覺的。你是否可以自己處理任何事情?你可能感到自豪但也可能經曆心力交瘁。如果你獲得更多,當你發現你不是真的快樂的時候會發生什麼?我們尋找幸福往往被阻止是因為我們無法意識到真相。對自己誠實是另一個可怕的前景,但它使你幸福和成功。


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